Sunday, August 19, 2007

just like to point out




Sorry- didn't mean to load this one on.... and now i can't delete it! But try to find the humor in knowing they patrol the toilets. ("Excuse me! You've been in here quite a while...", "Security, coming through!"; "Oh, and what do you do for a living? You work toilet securty. Seriously?")


that even thought it says i posted my last entry on sunday, it's monday here and sunday in the u.s. I'm not incompitent or confused as to the day. it's the stupid international date line!





Cheers guys. God bless!





Oh, and here are a couople of pics from visting Sydney's Chinatown. The food's amazing!

August 19

Whoa. It's already Monday. Granted it's only 12:12 a.m., but i'm feeling a bit inclinded to start freaking out about uni work and how much i need to get done this week. See, the problem is that i work best under mass amounts of pressure. This means I usually find it necessary (although usually by accident) to leave any important projects until two or three days before they are due, not sleep, come out of my room, or eat until they are finished. Needless to say, this may not be the best method. But it works.

So my friend Jenny is visitng from Montana, and has been here since Tuesday. she leaves Saturday, which seems very soon> We spent the weekend at my friend's beach house on the south coast, in a place called Malua Bay (just south of Bateman's Bay.) Her parents have sold the house, adn she wanted to say good-bye to it.Some of her mates from Canberra came up and we had a good time drinking, just relaxing.

I spent a fair bit of time on the beach, not because it was warm and sunny, quite the contrary, it was rainy and cold, but because I could. it's a novelty to have the ocea there, to be able to sit and watch the waves come in, watch surfer's get pummelled, and kids skip around in the surf.

Something about the ocean makes me think deeply, consider areas of myself and my life that i've put on hold, pushed to the back of my mind. There's something about its vastness, darkness, and rhythm that stops everything else.

My friends Jenny and Kim walked down to the beach with me late saturday night. It was still rianing, the clouds making the sky dark and impossible to separate from the ocean on the horizon. A large black world, broken only by strips of white, the incoming waves, offered a new perspective, the one people are always looking for. You see, last night, the world was black and white. The waves broke out of the blackness, rolling in white until they splintered along the sand, and leave no trace. There were no shades of gray.

The largest, most complicated issues of this world are those that are not black and white, but are colored by shades of gray. Matters of the heart, of the sould, of the mind, we keep hoping one day we'll wake up and find there was a right and wrong all along. That the waves on teh horizon always emerged white from a black night.

But the world's not like that. We won't ever be able to erase the gray, replace it with a solid.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

THE FAUX MULO-HAWK






THE FAUX MULOHAWK AND WHY IT SHOULD BE OUTLAWED










The Faux Mulohawk: A Definition










The faux mulohawk is a haircut currently popular among males in Australia. It is not a mohawk, a faux-hawk, or a mullet, but a nasty combination of the three. Essentially, the wearer has a fake mohawk with longish hair covering the back of his neck.










It is this




PLUS THIS





Which equals something awful between the two. Unfortunately, the only picture i could find (on such short notice) was this one:






The photo gives a fairly accurate, if mild, representation of the faux mulohawk> The problem is getting past the ridiculously SHORT SHORTS to the hair. On the plus side, it's an excellent introduction to Australia's favorite sport, rugby, and their uniforms, including knickers/shorts.

THE FAUX MULOHAWK IS NEGATIVELY IMPACTING SOCIETY

This particular hairstyle is causing an animalistic regression of the human species. The men of Australia who sport this style greatly resemble overgrown birds. That's right, birds. In particular, the rooster and casuary birds. These are birds who possess either a comb or a casque. In either case, the protrusion is located in hearly the same area as the faux mulohawk (FMH).

The comb is used by roosters to scare away other males and attrack females. We are all aware chickens are not particularly bright birds, which is probably why this works at all. Although the male looks utterly ridiculous strutting about with that thing stuck to his head, the female refrains from mocking laughter and ostracizing the bird from the flock, eventually embracing and even mating with it.

I am afraid this will happen to Australian society. The women will cease to recognize the FMH as an indication of stupidity, blindness, a manifestation of a weaker, less deseriable characterisitc, and reproduce with him. Thus causing natural selection to fail miserably. Fall flat on its face. Die in the arms of a cock-combed FMH-ing idiot of a man who was too weak to stand against society's joke.

Because yes, the FMH must be a joke. The fashion industry was bored, busy overlaying computer images when they created the FMH. You know they are all sitting in their offices, cracking up, and the guy who bet $20 it would never catch on is walking to work becuase that was his bus money.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Ramblings...

I am currently unable to sleep due to a combination of over-caffeination (I had a cup of coffee about three hours ago) and over-tiredness, which my body seems to think means "Keep going until clinical fatigue sets in, then go ahead and sleep". In the meantime, I'm awake, but unable to do anything productive. I could be researching one of the many topics i have papers due on this semester, or perhaps preparing for class on friday (no class tomorrow, thursday, thank goodness), but my body seems to have commanded my brain to cease all non-vital function> That is, I am breathign and that's about it... no cognitive function about the drivel I am writing here.
So things have been good since i got back. It was good to have madeline here- I hope she enjoyed herself. I felt bad a couple of days because I had class and we couldnt' really do anything. And although sydney is big and lovely, it's entertainment is limited. Or at least it is if youd on't konw what there is to do. Anyway, selfishly, i am enjoying have my room back to myself for a few more days. Jenny Kossler arrives on Monday. We'll see how that goes... I relaly do have to do uni work at some point (like before the night before it's due) and company can be distracting. Especially because company over the age of 18 means "party!" in Aussie.
By the way, i am proficient in Australian, but not fluent. Ben (housemate) said something tonight and I swore he was speaking goblin. But no, apparently it was his particular brand of english.
So the next coupel of weeks/ months are a bit busy. Still havent' turned in my paperwork to stay for next semester, but I am working on it. I've been a bit overwhelmed by the amount of work i have to do. I am still feeling pressured to find a job... mostly because I realize how much i miss working. It's nice to interact with strangers on a regular basis. Not sure why, but it is.
I am thinking about heading to new zealand in october... we'll see how that goes. I would really love to go to uluru or perth, but both are fairly expensive to get to, much moreso than NZ. We'll see how that goes. The way things look, i will need my weeks off to recover from not sleeping!
Uni is okay... my classes thus far are intermittently interesting, with boring patches and a chance of complete frustration. Im only ever frustrated with teachers who can't teach... they must not have to take any courses whatsoever in effective communication. There's this one lady who demonstrated how to do a differential stain (microbiology, not laundry) with her back to the class, completely obscuring plate... then told us all to "Shush!" whenever we talked. Labs, apparently, are silent places. It makes for a long couple of hours, especially when you have questions.
In another, we discussed how the NSW (New South Wales) government pays for methadone (prescription narcotic) for heroin addicts to prevent them from using heroin. Essentially, the addicts can recieve FREE narcotics (paid for by the taxpayers). They are not required to reduce their dose or eventually go off of methadone. The idea, as I understand it, is to simply prevent hte use of heroin. So they give them legal drugs instead.
I'm not sure how i feel about this. On one hand, it's an effective mechanism to reduce the spread of infections associated with intravenous drug use while negatively impacting the illegal drug trade and providing the addict with a safe (r) alternative to heroin. On the other, the taxpayers are supporting druggies. You see the conflict.
I wish I could say I'm tired, but I'm not. Perhaps I'll lay in bed and try to detatch the ugly glow-in-the-dark stickers from my ceiling using telekinesis. hey, it's worth a shot.

Cairns cont'd



Well, guys, as usual, i've done a horrible job of continuously posting updates here. BUT I will try to make it up to you by putting up pics from when I was in Cairns. Naturally, most of them are form the reef.
The amazing thing about the reef is that it really is an incredible as every picture makes it look. I thought maybe it was one of those natural wonders where all the pictures they take to advertise for it are taken within like, six square meters of ONE part of the reef. But no, all of it is absolutely amazing! We visited four different sections of the Outer Reef. I got to try scuba diving (WOW) and did a lot of snorkeling.
I also consumed a massive amount of seawater and managed to bruise my forehead with the goggles. I know, how impressive is that??? I've decided SCUBA and snorkeling equipment is ridiculous looking (i can't be the only one who thinks this), especially wet suits. Wetsuits, by the way, were apparently created to embarass me. Had a bit of trouble getting into one on the first day, had to have the guy help me, where he promptly had to be waaaaaay too close to um, my parts and staring directly at my cleavage. Wetsuits were clearly created by men as another way to give women cleavage. Seriously.
So enjoy the photos! Be jealous. I can't blame you!